So I went to the doctor today for my annual check up. The good news is I'm relatively healthy & relatively uncrazy. :) I'll be weaning off the anti-depressants after about a year and a half or so of being on them for anxiety. It seems that life has put itself back into a more tolerable state & with exercise and yoga and a less stressful job, I'm in a much better emotional state than last summer. So for 2 months I wean off, then I'm done. So we'll see how that goes...
The less great news is that when I told him what my cholesterol numbers were, he seemed slightly alarmed. That means for SURE I have to do something about it. I have to get it officially tested for his office, rather than the life insurance testing done in July. But I dont imagine it will be much lower. Both issues sort of go back to one major character flaw: I have to learn a lesson in self control.
YUCK.
Self control?! Disapline?! Ewww. Look - I can't even properly SPELL discipline!
I love working out - as anyone can tell. I enjoy the gym and actually have been thinking more and more about increasing the intensity of my work out routine. I find P90X, in all my pain and swearing at the TV, FUN of all things. I enjoy the challenge and the time alone, and I have some lofty goals of marathons and races and tryouts (of which are in the back of my head at this time...). But here's the truth: it's a matter of health. With a history of heart issues in my family, high cholesterol at the age of not-30 scares me. It's why I joined a gym in the first place! But working out in all it's fun and ease isn't enough. So now I have to actually put some effort into it.
I'll never understand why those things that are so bad for us - whether it's people or food or work or whatever - are so appealing? I dont want to be on the "if it taste good, spit it out" diet, but at the same time I dont want to feel like I"m missing out or being deprived. I quite literally want to have my cake and eat it too! I just need someone to teach me how to do it. I'm semi-seriously considering Weight Watchers because I need to learn how to eat. I need to learn healthy alternatives to the foods that I love that don't love me back. I need to learn how to shop - and not just for me, but for my kids too.
I've been reading more and more about the gulten free, casen free diets and their impact on autism & general health. More and more it seems like something to try. I'm not, however, met with such enthusiasm from Drew. I dont think AJ would care one way or another - especially with all of the GF foods out there including chicken nuggets & other kid-diet staples. But the thought of the major life overhaul that goes with it...UGH. And it's no doubt about habits - changing what I blindly grab out of habit at the grocery store or what I order at the take out line (which is always the same thing, no matter how long I stare at the menu - as Drew points out every time...).
Why is it so hard to buck habits you KNOW are bad?
Getting THROUGH it...not just being stuck in it.
